The Pressure to Be “Successful” Is a Scam—Here’s the Real Truth

Let’s talk about that gnawing pressure to “be successful.”You know the one—it's basically our society’s favorite anxiety flavor.

It whispers to you at 3 a.m., shows up every time you open Instagram, and silently judges your lunch choices like, “Is that what a successful person would eat?” (Spoiler: yes, because successful people eat real food, not just kale and manifestation mantras.)

But seriously—what even is success? And why do we all feel like we’re constantly falling short of it?

Let’s unpack this, raw and real.

When Did "Success" Become a Soul-Sucking Hustle?

Once upon a time, success might’ve looked like being alive, having a roof, or not being chased by a bear. Now it’s:

• A 6-figure business by 25

• A soulmate who looks good in travel selfies

• A green smoothie habit and an 8-pack

• Peace, passion, purpose… and perfect lighting for your desk setup

  
  

Basically, you have to be a walking Pinterest board with a trauma-free childhood and a thriving side hustle, or else you’re doing life wrong.

What in the actual hell?

No wonder everyone is exhausted and slightly dead inside.

We’ve taken “success” and turned it into this toxic, performative, anxiety-inducing thing that leaves no room for being human. And it’s not just the influencers—this stuff creeps into therapy rooms, office Zoom calls, family dinners, and even our quiet moments alone.

Let’s Get Honest About This

Here’s the truth: Success is a moving target.And most of us are aiming at someone else’s bullseye.

You’re probably carrying some version of success that was handed to you—by your parents, society, or that one girl in college who had her life “together” (plot twist: she cried into her cereal every morning too).

Maybe you thought success meant climbing the ladder, but now you’re halfway up and you’re like, “Why does it feel like the air is thinner up here and I forgot how to breathe?”

Or maybe you’ve checked all the boxes—degree, job, house, relationship—and you still feel…empty. (Hi, that’s not a you problem. That’s a “wrong damn boxes” problem.)

Let’s Redefine This Thing

So let me ask you something real:What would success look like if nobody else got to vote on it?

Not your mom.Not your ex.Not your boss.Not the girl on TikTok selling digital planner templates for $300.

Just you.

What would it feel like?

Maybe success is:

• Feeling peaceful in your own body

• Having time for slow mornings and dance parties in your kitchen

• Creating something that lights you up

• Being in love with your own damn life—even when it’s messy

  
  

Maybe success isn’t about how much money you make, but how much meaning you create.

Maybe it’s not about what people see, but how you feel.

That changes everything, doesn’t it?

When the Hustle Doesn’t Feel Holy

Let’s get one thing straight: there’s nothing wrong with wanting more.

Want the six figures? Go get it.Want to build an empire? Babe, build it.Want to write the book, host the event, lead the revolution? Do. The. Thing.

But please, I’m begging you—don’t sacrifice your soul at the altar of success.

You are not a machine.You are not your productivity.You are not your title, your followers, your salary, your “brand.”

You’re a whole, complex, divine, beautiful mess of a human being, and your worth is not tied to your output.

Not now.

Not ever.

The Real Flex? Being Fully You.

You know what’s actually impressive in 2025?

• Being gentle with yourself in a world that tells you to grind.

• Laughing at your mistakes instead of spiraling into shame.

• Saying, “This doesn’t align with me,” and walking away from something “impressive.”

• Taking naps. Setting boundaries. Choosing rest over performance.

  
  

The real success story is becoming the version of yourself who feels like home.

And that starts when you stop trying to earn your worth, and start living from it.

Final Thoughts (aka Your Pep Talk)

You don’t need to do more to be successful.You just need to get closer to yourself.

That pressure you feel? That heaviness? That “not enoughness”?

It’s not the truth. It’s just conditioning.

Noise. Static.

The real truth?

You’re already worthy.

Already valuable.

Already doing enough.

So give yourself permission to live by your own definition of success—one that feels less like pressure and more like freedom.

That’s the version that’ll actually change your life.

And hey—if you need a little soul-medicine to keep going, preorder a copy of my poetry book, Poems for When You’re Falling Apart (and Still Showing Up).

It’s like a hug and a laugh and a kick-in-the-ass, all rolled into one.

You’re not alone in this.

And you’re doing better than you think.

🩵

Sarah